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My new word is yielding. This came to me while I was getting my monthly massage (yes, #selfcare2021, people!). Believe it or not, I often have to remind myself to relax during a massage. Instead of anticipating what’s going to happen next, I tell myself to just go with the flow.

I define yielding in work and life as doing what I can, but not pushing myself so hard that I drive myself crazy. Once I feel like I’m pushing too hard anywhere in my life, I know I need to slow down and let some things pass. I’m not perfect at this yet, but at least being aware of it helps.

I was reflecting on the yielding concept in relation to how many times I thought I had life figured out. And I found myself pushing too hard to make that story a reality. Everything from work to relationships to parenting.

Once I slowed down and let certain things happen, the story unfolded differently. I found I didn’t have to work as hard to get to a particular outcome. And it ended up turning out better than what I could have done myself.

Let me give you an example:

Many years ago, we were considering buying some office space. We’d been working from home and noticed that most of our competitors in town had offices. We felt like it was time for us to grow by purchasing a space and hiring more employees. We found one that looked ideal.

One day, we were heading out to meet a real estate agent to give us a tour of the space. While at a stop light, we were rear ended. We pulled over and saw that both cars just had some minor scratches. It wasn’t enough to get the insurance companies involved, so we continued on to our meeting.

We toured the space. It was nice, but the monthly payment would have been a bit out of reach. We were focused on making the business bigger and better, but we would soon find out that that shouldn’t be our main priority. That fender bender was designed to literally slow us down. A few weeks later, we learned that we were expecting our first child.

I now see all of this as divine intervention. I didn’t need to be jealous of what our competitors were doing because our formula was working just fine.

I remember that story often when I feel stressed trying to reach a certain goal. Often yielding to what life has to offer brings you unexpected gifts that are better than what you were planning.


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